Concerning Seperation, a few things Not To Do
This particular post is strictly for the purpose of THINGS NOT TO DO!
Soon after my husband moved out of our house, I started dating. Think badly if you like, it’s OK. I couldn’t stand my husband and had been trying to get him to leave our home and give me a divorce for 2 years. He never wanted to leave and I was only able to remove him by threatening him with arrest. (I’ll cover that in another post)
I digress.
I decided I would have my guest over for dinner.(mistake one) I wasn’t ready to introduce my “friend” to my children so we planned a late dinner. After dinner my friend excuses himself to the bathroom and then…A knock at the door. I peer through the window to see my “soon to be ex” husband standing at my front door at 12:45am.
A visual for you:
I am 5’5-140lbs, my soon to be ex, 6’3-285lbs and my friend, 5’10-185lbs. Okay?
At this point I realize we may have a bit of a situation on our hands and tell my friend to go upstairs to the family room(mistake two) and take the phone if he needs to call the police. I open the door slightly(mistake three) and ask my STBE(soon-to-be-ex) what on earth he is doing at the house at 12:45am! I tell him everyone is asleep and to go home. He was flushed, gritting his teeth and I’m pretty sure shaking. By now I realize he wasn’t just strolling by the house and decided to visit. I am pretty sure he had been stalking the house and knew my friend was there. He tells me he has come by to check on the kids. He says this over and over as he is starting to push on the door. I told him he was scaring me and to leave. I try to push the door shut, he throws the door open, me to ground and starts up the stairs. I start yelling at him to get out of the house. I get half way up the stairs(mistake four) and grab him only to be tossed down the stairs. I hear the door to the family room smash open, the two men yelling, some banging, more banging and I head up the stairs again.(mistake five is going up stairs and not calling 911) I get into the room, my STBE has my friend blocked in a corner. I guess I distracted the STBE when I came in the room because when he turned his head my friend bounded out of the room down the stairs and out the front door. My STBE runs down the stairs and out the door after him. Shocked I’m standing in the middle of my living room when the police walk in.(my neighbor heard the commotion and called) Soon after the police my STBE walks back in. He is attempting to convince the police he was well within his rights to basically break into my house, assault me and attempt to assault someone else. My friend had met the police at the entrance of my neighborhood and already explained what happened. I’m banged up, a little bruised, a little scraped up and my STBE is without a scratch.(his account of what happened was I attacked him)
Hindsight: I knew my STBE was a loon. I think in the back of my head I knew he had the ability to be a stalker(it got worse..future posts) if not out right violent. Having my friend there at all, while the kids were there was a major no-no.
Two years later I married my “friend”. (more future posts)
